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  • #ad In only a few weeks these little legs and feet aren’t going to seem so little anymore. Ben loves babies, so I have a feeling he’s going to love his baby sis. Buuut he really likes cuddling his mama so I don’t know how happy he will be to share me with someone else while Blaire is at school. He’s already nailing it in the big brother department by trying out baby sis’s crib mattress. He already asked to sleep in there tonight! 🤣🤣🤣 And if it makes him sleep through the night then I’m down. This mattress is actually made in Illinois. It’s non-toxic and has no springs. You can use code TRISTACRIB for $35 off your purchase of a crib mattress. There’s a link in my bio to shop. • 
#benjaminp #2yearsold #twoyearsold #terribletwos #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom
  • The one who made me a mama. This will be her first full week of kindergarten and every day her favorite part is recess. 🤣 She just keeps talking nonstop about how excited she is to have another baby to snuggle soon because Ben is “too wiggly” to let her hold him anymore. Today she asked me if I was ready to get this baby out or if I was nervous? Then she said not to worry because she will help pack the diaper bag whenever we leave the house, so I feel like that’s a real win/win for me. 🙌🏻 #blairep
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#5yearsold #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom #happilytrista
  • 35 weeks and feelin’ it. I’m finally nesting which is great because we have a million things to do still. Including getting this house ready for a “half” birthday party for Blaire and Ben this weekend. We were moving so close to their birthdays this spring that we never had a party and Blaire has kept talking about wanting to have all of her friends over to celebrate. Soooo a half birthday party it is. The bonus is the weather is WAY better than in February and March so we can actually have people hang out outside, have a bonfire and make s’mores. So I’m super excited and I guess it’s a good push for a final deep clean of this house before we welcome our final member in (hopefully) less than 5 weeks! #35weekspregnant #thirdtrimester #happilytrista
  • I hit 34 weeks earlier this week and supposedly this baby is the size of a box of Eggo waffles. 🤣🤣 It feels like fall is here and it’s fabulous. I got to sleep in today while Jason got up with the kids. I showered and got ready for the first time all week and I feel like a new person. 🙌🏻 We have a few parties / plans for this long weekend, but nothing too crazy. How about you?
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#34weekspregnant #thirdtrimester #targetstyle #targetdoesitagain #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom #happilytrista
  • Look who started preschool today! 😍 He only went for an hour (they split their class in half the first two weeks) but he didn’t cry at drop off, told me all about his snack and the playground and how he got to play with trucks. I am so proud of him! And it’ll be nice to have a few hours each week to just hang out with baby sis. #benjaminp
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#2yearsold #twoyearsold #terribletwos #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom #happilytrista
  • #ad Sorry baby, when you’re the third child I’m not sure you really get anything just for yourself. This @philipsavent Soothie Snuggle came in the #NewMomBBoxx  from @babbleboxxofficial. Ben immediately claimed it for himself because he is still a binky lover. I shared a bit about each of the products in the box in my most recent blog post.
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#2yearsold #twoyearsold #terribletwos #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom #happilytrista
  • SO many emotions today on this big girl’s first day of school... for me anyways! She was mostly just excited and just a little nervous. We all made bracelets together last night and we are going to look at them today whenever we miss each other. As she was walking away to her teacher, she ran back to make sure we all had our bracelets on. 😭😭😭
It’s such a weird season of life to go from having her home all day, to a year of pre-k for 3 hours a day / 4 days a week, to kindergarten with her gone 7.5 hours a day. Plus a little brother at home asking to go pick her up and soon to be a baby sis home with me too! Ben and I are counting down the hours until we can pick her up and hear all about her first day. ❤️ #blairep
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#momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom #happilytrista
  • #ad The only thing better than a husband who likes to cook, and is good at it, too? A husband who likes to cook with your children! I shared our experience with @RaddishKids cooking box on the blog, including a coupon code so you can try it for yourself. •
#RadKidsCook #RaddishKids #KidsintheKitchen #CookingwithKids #RaddishPartner #5yearsold #motherhoodintheraw #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom #happilytrista
  • today was the due date for our baby who we miscarried at Christmas. It’s a hard thing to mourn this day for our baby in heaven, knowing we will have our baby girl here with us in a few months. it makes me feel like I don’t appreciate this rainbow baby, but I do. obviously. being pregnant so quickly after our miscarriage has helped me to cope, but this day was still hard. my anxiety has been high these past few weeks. I’ve been trying to give myself grace, but as moms it can be so hard to make time for ourselves, to prioritize our own health. —
as I sat in the waiting room at my OBGYN yesterday I couldn’t help but think of all the times I’ve sat there, broken-hearted. during my fertility appointments while we were trying for our second baby. during all of the ultrasounds and appointments for my pregnancy in December. seeing people come out with their strips of ultrasound papers. laughing and smiling over their sweet baby. something I had done before without giving a second thought to the fact that other people in the exact same waiting room might be having one of the worst days of their life. I wondered if anyone there was having one of their worst days and prayed for everyone there. —
I’m not sure there’s really any point to this other than to say life is full of good and bad, ups and downs. if you are going through a bad time now, just know you’re not alone. this bad time will pass.
—
people don’t always share their bad, so can’t we all just treat others the way we want to be treated? be kind. be the reason someone smiles instead of being another reason they frown. •
#rainbowbaby #miscarriage #1in4 #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom #happilytrista
  • our ultrasound this weekend confirmed our final little babe is, indeed, a baby girl. I think she looks just like her big brother. If she follows in his footsteps we will meet her in just 6 weeks! so now I’m slightly freaking out about all of the random things we need for her since I’ve basically done 0 prep. 😬 #thirdchildproblems •
#32weekspregnant #thirdtrimester #thirdbaby #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom
  • snack break #benjaminp | Less than 3 months and we’ll be adding another kiddo to our crew. I have been looking back through baby pictures and am just so dang excited to meet this new baby. I can’t wait to see if they look like either of their siblings... also can’t wait to find out if it’s really a she or a he! 🤪🤣 #benjaminp #happilytrista
June 7, 2015

My Battle with Anxiety as a Mom

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mom anxiety

That’s right! I’m talking about a giant/enormous/consuming/crazy emotion I call Mom Anxiety. I never considered myself a worrier before becoming a mom. Did bad things happen in the world? Yes. Could something bad happen to me? Or to someone I love? Yes. Did it keep me up every night? Nope. Did I obsess over it every. single. day? Not really. 

But it’s crazy, because the more I’ve learned about anxiety, the more I’ve realized that I’ve never lived a “normal” life. While my anxiety never kept me up at night, it did keep me from leaving the house. It kept me from large groups and public places. It kept me from leaving my apartment after dark. I’ve never been carefree. From as early as I could remember, I’ve had unrealistic worry about everyday things. I always just thought that was part of my personality. I was afraid of the dark. I was afraid of what could happen in a large group of people. I was afraid of my house catching on fire. But I never realized that I obsessed over these things. Until I became a mom.

From the day I found out I was pregnant, my anxiety has tripled. I found out on a Sunday, Father’s Day, and that night I had to drive out of town for work. During that four hour drive, it hit me for the first time. I was now completely responsible for another life. Someone was depending on me in a way I had never experienced before. Throughout pregnancy, even the most healthy pregnancy, there are so many things to worry about. Is your baby healthy?Is he/she moving enough?Is he/she the right size? #anixiety

Once Blaire was born, the worry shifted to whether or not she was breathing. Is she sleeping enough?, Is she sleeping too much?, Is she sleeping in a position that’s going to make her head flat? So. many. worries. And as your child becomes mobile? More and more to worry about. Blaire didn’t sleep in her own room until she was 10 months old. And it had nothing to do with what she wanted… I just felt she was safer in our room. Hell, I still feel like she’s safer in our room. When she’s asleep in her own bed, I can’t shut my brain off… What if she stops breathing?, What if someone breaks in?, What if there is a fire?, What if she gets sick? Are you sensing a pattern? My life is a flurry of what-ifs and worst-case scenarios. 

At any given moment I am worried about the million different things that could happen to Blaire, Jason or our family and friends. Then there are the tragic stories all around. On the news, online, something that’s happened to a friend of a friend. These are stories I cannot forget. These are stories I obsessed over for days, weeks, or even months. I feel for these parents I’ve never met. Parents I will never meet. It’s scary and it’s stressful. And it breaks my heart. It keeps me up at night. I pray to not know that hurt, that anger, that stress of going through a horrible tragedy.

At first I blamed it on Facebook. It seemed like it was one of my biggest channels for stress and anxiety. Every time I checked my newsfeed there was something terrible or negative to read about. Whether it’s a sick baby, or a mother who was tragically killed… there’s truly no end to the negative, scary scenarios out there. To combat the anxiety I had every time I checked my newsfeed, I ended up unliking a lot of news outlets (and even Cosmo magazine!), to help cut down on the amount of tragedies I see on my newsfeed. But it’s truly something I can’t get away from. I’ve found I can make myself anxious over things that I dream up in my own head, just as much as I can about real-life stories from the news.

The positive of this whole situation is it reminds me to cherish every single moment with Blaire (and everyone else I love, for that matter). For the longest time, I’ve thought I was crazy. But now I know I’m not the only one. Anxiety effects 18% of the population, but it’s always been taboo for people to talk about. Well thank God that has changed, because being aware of my issues has definitely helped me learn how to control them.

Does being a mom make you an anxious, nervous mess? If so, how do you deal with it? 

And, because I always like to end on a positive note, here’s the girl who makes being a crazy, anxious mama so, so worth it. xoIMG_4819

Updated March 2016 and again July 2016.

My Battle with Anxiety as a Mom

  • Reply
    christina rambo
    March 18, 2016 at 1:57 pm

    You are not alone! I actually blog about my anxiety. The best resource for me have been books by Dr. Claire weekes. Seriously so helpful!

    • Reply
      Trista
      March 22, 2016 at 10:15 pm

      Hi Christina! What’s your blog? I’d LOVE to check it out. And I’ll have to check out her books, too! Thank you!

  • Reply
    Denise Renae
    March 18, 2016 at 2:08 pm

    Hey Trista! I found you on the Blog & Business FB Group. I can completely understand you in this! This is definitely something all us first time moms deal with! I actually just created a post this morning about why it gets easier the more children you have. One of those reasons is because us moms deal with less fear compared to what we dealt with when we had our first. If you’d like, check it out :) http://www.deniserenae.com/get-easier-more-children/

  • Reply
    Sandi Schwartz
    March 19, 2016 at 11:30 am

    Great, honest post. You are definitely not alone. I have always been a worrier and come from a long line of worriers, but my anxiety spiked once I had to deal with infertility and high risk pregnancies. Being a parent is the hardest job in the world, and all the social media and news keep information in our face 24/7. I love how you are trying to focus on gratitude amongst all the stress. That’s what we have to do. Enjoy every minute!

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  • ice cream outside with two of my favorite people. when it’s only 70° outside you can actually eat your ice cream without it melting all over us... and by us I mean them. 👆🏻👆🏻 #blaireandben
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#2yearsold #5yearsold #momof3 #motherhoodintheraw #lifegivingsquares #petitejoy #motherhoodrising #ourcandidlife #uniteinmotherhood #mymamahood #seekthesimplicity #sharegood #joyfulmamas #documentlife #dailyparenting #momblogger #honestlymothering #therealparenthood  #thehappycapture #momsofinstagram #mytinymoments #thecreativecollective #realmotherhood #lifestyleblogger #stopdropandmom
  • Prepping for our third baby has been pretty easy so far. I guess when you have an older sister and brother, plus a mama who likes to hold on to everything from her babies, there isn’t a ton of shopping to do. The kids are having fun picking out little gifts to give baby sister in the hospital (something Blaire still talks about from when Ben was born), little toys here and there, PJs, and this @babyeinstein 4-in-1 Kickin Tunes Music & Language Discovery Gym at @target. I wasn’t joking when I said they wanted to test it out! #babyeinstein #ignitecuriosity #socialspotters #blaireandben #happilytrista
  • #ad I can’t believe this girl is heading off to kindergarten! With afternoon pre-k last year, we were lucky to not have to worry about the morning rush. So this year, our go-to is a waffle and a chocolate milk for the ride to school. Horizon® Shelf Stable Chocolate Milk is our favorite since we can easily grab it and go! Spoiler alert: she takes one in her lunch, too. Blaire is so excited, but little brother and I are sad to see her spend so much time away from us. But I am excited to be able to walk her to school and avoid the CRAZY drop-off and pick-up lines while the weather’s still nice, anyways. 
You can find @HorizonOrganic Chocolate Milk at @KrogerCo and you can even save $1 with this digital coupon (7/24/19 – 8/6/19). And you can stock up because Horizon Organic milk boxes are shelf-stable, meaning you can safely store them in the pantry. Shop now through the link in my bio. #blaireandben
  • Well we don’t have a Nordstrom near us, but we do have an Aldi. Most of their summer items are on clearance and we scored this sweet pool for $7. Winner, winner. 🦄☀️ #blaireandben
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#summer #momentsiwanttoremember #aldifinds #motherhood
  • This summer hasn’t really felt like summer yet. 🤨 So when we have an 85° day we make the most out of it with a trip to the pool! How’d you spend your Sunday Funday? #blaireandben
  • another day, another doctors appointment for someone in our crew. today it’s Ben. he was up overnight saying his ear hurt — a double ear infection for him. luckily the kid loves taking medicine and hasn’t let his ears get him down! as long as he’s up moving around they’re fine, but the second he lays down... 😭😭😭. hoping our poor buddy is feeling better tomorrow. do you feel like you need a frequent flier card for your pediatrician? just me? okay. #blaireandben #itsfinewerefine
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#uniteinmotherhood #motherhoodintheraw #momentsiwanttoremember #mybabies
  • When your brother is getting big but you still want to hold him... you gotta pinch his butt because he’s so wiggly. 😂😬😍 #blaireandben •
#petitejoys  #childhoodunplugged #letthembelittle #ohheymama #tagtheqc #mybeautifulmess #thehappynow  #thepursuitofjoyproject #thatsdarling #livethelittlethings #momentsiwanttoremember #everydaymoments #nothingisordinary #motherhoodrising
  • It is definitely bittersweet to leave the house where we brought both of these babies home. But we are excited for our next chapter as a family of five! #rainbowbaby #blaireandben
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#pregnancyannouncement #rainbowbabyannouncement #firsttrimester
  • Last night was our first night in the new house. 👏🏻 We still have lots of stuff to bring from the old house and then lots of cleaning over there before the final walk through and closing next Monday. Then we can focus on getting this house unpacked and organized. But first, I would like a nap. 😴 #blaireandben #happilytristahome
  • The snow that never ends. 🙄🥶 Walked out into the snow this afternoon and one kid loved it, the other not so much. “Wowwww! It’s like a wizard out here.” —Blaire 😂
“Yuck!” —Ben #blaireandben
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#bestofmom #momlifestyle #momlifeisthebestlife #motherhoodunplugged #mymotherhood #honestmotherhood #slowmotherhood #mymamahood #midwestblogger #eternalmotherhood #motherhoodintheraw #unitedinmotherhood #motherhoodrising #polarvortex
  • Sibling love: hugging 5% of the time, wrestling 95% of the time. Another day... another target trip. And in PJs because it’s so cold and, well, if you’re still in PJs at 4pm, what’s the point of changing? #tristalovestarget #blaireandben
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#bestofmom #momlifestyle #momlifeisthebestlife #motherhoodunplugged #ohheymamas #ig_motherhood #sinplemoments #mymotherhood #teammotherly #honestmotherhood #slowmotherhood #mymamahood #justmomlife #mom_hub #ohheymama #pursuepretty #midwestblogger #motherhoodthroughinstagram #eternalmotherhood #motherhoodintheraw #unitedinmotherhood #motherhoodrising