10 Things I Thought Would Be Different About Motherhood
When I found out I was pregnant with Blaire in June of 2013, I knew my life was about to change dramatically. I also thought I knew how it was going to change. HA! If you’re a mama, I have a feeling you’re going to LOL at these. If you’re not a mama, you have friends who are moms. You have a mom. You think you know the basics. You think you know what it’ll be like. I know I did. While motherhood is sooo different from person to person, there are some things that unite us. Lack of sleep. Love for dry shampoo. All the worry for our precious babies. AND the fact we had no idea how much these precious babies would change our lives.
- I thought I would never wear maternity clothes.
WHY?! WHY did I ever resist maternity clothing? Maternity leggings are the best thing to have ever happened to my pregnant self. A close second — maternity jeans. I wore those jeans until Blaire was 4 months old. Hell, maybe even longer. And my maternity leggings? I still wear them. No shame.
- I thought being pregnant guaranteed amazing hair and glowing skin.
I didn’t get either one. My hair didn’t get longer or thicker. My skin actually got worse. But guess what? Even if you grow long, thick, beautiful hair during your pregnancy, it’s probably going to fall out. All of your beautiful, new hair and then some. It’s called postpartum hair loss. And it’s not fair.
- I thought my maternity leave would give me a chance to do so. many. activities.
Lolol. I had Blaire via scheduled C Section, so I worked right up until the day she was born. And I had quite the list made for my 12 weeks of freedom. I was going to paint our ugly orange bathroom. Maybe even paint the kitchen? I was going to be so crafty and Pinterest it up all over this house. I was going to steam clean the carpets. I would have all of the laundry done, ironed and put away at all times. There wouldn’t be a house cleaner than mine. Instead… I adopted the popular motto of sleeping when the baby sleeps. It was incredible. And guess what? I don’t feel a single bit of guilt. You never get that precious bonding time back and I’m happy I used every bit of it to soak in my newborn baby.
- I thought I would continue to shower regularly.
If I felt like a shower, I could just place my precious baby in her crib. Or her bouncer. Or her swing. And skip on into the bathroom. Couldn’t I? Nope. If I had the energy for a shower AND Blaire happened to be asleep in her swing I would get the baby monitor out. Set it up. Hop into the shower. It never failed — Blaire would start crying. Like clockwork. And I thought I’d be able to let Blaire cry it out sometimes. Maybe just for 5 minutes while I washed my hair. Nope. Never. Ever. Hey, that’s what dry shampoo is for anyways, right?!
- I thought my baby would sleep in her crib after a few weeks. Maybe one month, tops.
If it wasn’t for me leaving Jason alone with Blaire overnight when she was 11 months old, I’m not sure when we would have ever transitioned her to her crib. I know my husband thought I was crazy. Yes, her room was right across the hall. But that’s so far away in mama/baby distance. What if the baby monitor goes out? What if I don’t hear her? What if she stops breathing? What if she wakes up and is scared? What if. What if. What if. I had so many reasons. Turns out, Blaire slept really well in her crib. Guess it was more comfortable than the pack and play we had her in for all those months. Not that she doesn’t still sneak into bed with mama and daddy, because she does. But hey, she starts out the night in her crib so that’s good enough for me!
- I thought I would work on her baby book every month, maybe even every week.
This is going to sound silly, but I am so nervous to write anything in her baby book! I’m such a perfectionist, but I love writing with a pen, hate writing with a pencil. I am so afraid I’m going to make a mess of it! Still. To this day. There are probably three things written in it. All the rest is chillin’ in the Notes app of my iPhone.
- I thought crying it out would be easy.
I was wrong. So wrong. I still hate letting Blaire cry it out. Now that she can speak, it’s even harder! Between cries as she’s yelling, “Mama” I can literally feel my heart breaking! Some nights she stops crying quickly, other nights she never stops crying so we break down and lay with her. Whatever makes you happy and results in sleep, right?
- I thought breastfeeding would be a breeze.
Why would I need to attend the four hour breastfeeding class? Breastfeeding is natural. Which means it’s easy, right?! Who knew you had to know how to hold your baby to help her latch. Or how to get her to latch. Or how to know if she was swallowing. So. many. important. details.
- I thought I would make all of my daughter’s baby food.
But seriously — how do you start? I had no idea what consistency her baby food should be. Should I buy some at the store just to see what it’s like? Try to copy it? That’s what I told myself. But, as it turns out, there is quality baby food out there that doesn’t require you to turn your kitchen into a laboratory. I can’t imagine how many hours of my life I got back here.
- I thought I knew what “tired” was.
When you’re 9 months pregnant you think you know what tired is. You get up to pee 7 times every night, for heaven’s sake. Well “9 months pregnant tired” has nothing on “I’ve gone 2 months without sleeping for more than 2 hours at a time” tired. Just sayin’.
Okay. So those are the top 10 things I thought would be different about motherhood. Do you have anything you thought would be different? Please share in the comments below! xo
Girl! This is so hilarious and real. I love it!!
Love it! I thought the same thing about my maternity leave! Haha!
Haha! Jokes on us! :)
I can relate to so many of these! Especially the breastfeeding, the showers and the sleeping in the next room. My five year old son still sleeps in our room, but in his own bed and we’re co-sleeping with our newborn daughter. I haven’t even been able to put her in the bassinet overnight because I can’t bare to not instantly be able to feel and see her breathing. Great post!
Thanks! I know that feeling… There just isn’t anything as comforting as having your babe sleeping right next to you. Until they’re a crazy toddler who kicks you in their sleep! lol.
My almost 5 year old still sleeps in our bed. We can put him to sleep in his bed and when we wake up he is in out bed! My almost 2 year old has no interested in sleeping anywhere but her crib. She won’t even fall alseep in her car seat. It the crib or not at all.
Hahaha! It’s so funny how every child is sooo different. Once you think you have it figured out, they change OR your next is completely different.
Nicole M Williams
I can totally relate to this post especially the TIRED part! But being a mother is one of the most wonderful thing that happened to me, no doubt about that. Great post!
TristaNicole M Williams
Thanks so much!
Yes to all of these. It all sounds so simple right? Not at all. Some day sleep will return.
Lol. I can’t wait for that day!!
These are all so true!! Thanks for this post, glad I’m not the only one that thought these things!
Thanks!! I’m glad I’m not alone, too! :)
Haha. great post!
AAAAHHHHH as someone thinking about having a baby this is hilarious but also quite terrifying :)
Lol! But it’s all so worth it in the end… it’s just so funny how things change once you actually have your babe.
Isn’t it funny that before you have a baby, you think all this stuff is totally do-able? Then once the little one arrives, it’s a fierce reality check. I was the same way with my first. Now I’ve got 3 and let me tell you, it’s tiring but so worth every second!!!
That’s something I am still wrapping my head around… the way your heart can actually expand when you have another child. It is so insane to me to think that I’ll ever be able to have another and love them with as much of my heart as I do Blaire. But I believe it’s possible!! Congrats to you, mama!
Yes! Motherhood is tough!
This is gonna sound cheesy, but I never anticipated the amount of love I could feel for that tiny little thing. I know everyone says that, but for me it was a legitimate surprise. I remember being overwhelmed with the responsibility of it all during the first week. Nursing, diaper changes, no sleep, and not having any time for me overshadowed the love at first sight feeling for me. But one night it hit me that she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen and I couldn’t bare the thought of ever living without her in our lives. You just can’t understand the depth of the love you’ll feel until after your baby is born.
Thanks so much for sharing! For me, I would feel so guilty when I’d find myself up for the 3AM feeding, wishing we were both asleep instead of sitting on the couch. One night I realized if I just changed my mind to realize how lucky I was to have her and to have this precious alone time with her. I think it completely changed my relationship with her! It made all those rough nights so much easier.
Well, you definitely nailed this on the head!